i want to preface this entire post by say this: i’m not a hardcore feminist. we clear on that? i’m not a feminist at all, in fact. all i want are equal rights between the sexes. this goes for everything in life, but the video game industry in particular and it just lets me down constantly.
i will tolerate a lot from gamers. i will tolerate the ‘mocking of the gamertag’, since if you’re bashing someone’s gametag, you probably don’t understand much in life. plus, i support charities that aim to reduce adult illiteracy. i also tolerate children under the age of 16 playing video games, since i know that one day their vocabulary will grow and eventually they will drop the word ‘noob’ and ‘pwned’.
here’s what i won’t tolerate: idiocy. or, as it is known in 2010, http://www.GameCrush.com.
this site is for the lazy and sketchy xbox 360 user. apparently, there are a lot of male gamers who, rather than make new friends, or enlist their [and i get this is a stretch] real-world friends to play, they will instead pay a real girl [i am not making this shit up] to play with them. there are more details on this trainwreck, and they are as follows:
Guys are Players and girls are PlayDates. Players pay to play and PlayDates get paid to play. Guys can browse PlayDate profiles (there are currently around 1,200), view photos, and even chat with girls for free. Once you find a gal you fancy you send her a game invite and if she accepts you get six to ten minutes of one-on-one gaming time. PlayDates have the ability to block any guy they want for any reason. When the service launches [ED: it was supposed to be March 23, but it’s not live yet] it will only support the Xbox 360 and a few casual games hosted on the GameCrush website, but there are plans to add PlayStation 3, Wii, and World of Warcraft support as soon as possible.
seriously? not having a girl friend or female friends in general doesn’t mean you turn to a service to buy women. who thought this shit up and went ‘oh what a good idea’?! and the names they thought up… ‘players’? i’m going to resort to a sterotype here to make point. if you’re unemployed, sitting in your parents’ basement at 3am on a tuesday night playing shit like halo, you need to get your priorities straight.
ALSO – calling the girls ‘playdates’ is, at best, like saying they’re hookers. at worst it’s automatically drawing a parallel between this shit and playboy. or mail order brides. god, i am beside myself with hostility.
You must be 18 or over to create a GameCrush account — it’s being touted as the first social site for adult gamers. It’s not an explicitly explicit service, but PlayDates set their gaming mood to either “flirty” or “dirty.” What the two of you chat about is entirely up to you. Signing up is free, but you must purchase credits in order to get your game on. For $8.25 you get 500 credits, which is enough for one game (400 credits) and a 100 credit tip at the end. An Xbox Live game will last 10 minutes, while a casual Flash game will get you six minutes of face time with your PlayDate. That’s literal face time, because you can video chat with your lady while playing a casual Flash game. Again, what goes on in that video chat is up to you and your PlayDate. GameCrush says it modeled its pricing structure after the cost of buying a girl a drink at a bar. In a bar, you’re basically buying the opportunity to chat a girl up.
HERE’S A TIP: ACTUALLY GO TO A BAR. did the creators even do this? frankly, this creepy girl gamer catalogue is a recipe for disaster. it’s almost like a mashup between craigslist personals and chatroulette, with added dashes of desperation and creep thrown in.
finally, what self-respecting gamer, girl OR guy, would pay someone to play with them? games are all about making connections, not buying them.