you know, i do like sony. i know, you are likely shocked since it seems like i rag on them a lot. the thing is they do a good job, most of the time. sometimes they take a good idea and fuck it up beyond repair.
today, i would like to draw your attention to the tester. it’s about 5 episodes in, and after viewing the trailer, i very nearly flew to the states and attempted to track down those responsible. it’s their half-assed attempt at ‘getting to know gamers’ and ‘getting in touch with the gaming community’. that’s cute. i’m sorry, but getting a bunch of lazy, self-centered college kids to do something important like testing video games makes me uncomfortable.
i had a convo recently with littlenerd_xo about this shit and game testers in general. she was pretty jealous of such a position – ‘you would get to try all the new games before anyone else does!’
i barely got through the trailer, and it’s awful. then i got to thinking… would i seriously want to be on this show? here’s the thing though: NO. i wouldn’t want to be a tester.
you’d have play games like uncharted 2 that weren’t polished. could you imagine? you’re getting into the thick of the action, you’re immersed in the plot. you tune everything out around you and you are so INTO the game it’s like it’s become an extension of your soul. you’re running down the alleyway while the truck chases you, and you’re screaming [maybe in real life?] and shooting that mofo like your life depends on it. you go to move forwad becauseit’ssoclose and – IT FREEZES.
shit. you were liking it. now you have to send it back to the developers so they can sort out the bug.
they get it back to you, let’s say in a week. you get the package, and you squeal a little bit with joy. you pop in the disk again, ready to get rockin’ with drake and the gang! soon, you’re running down the alleyway while the truck chases you, and you’re screaming [maybe not in real life] and shooting that mofo like your life depends on it. you go to jump and – IT FREEZES – two seconds past the first point.
sigh. another bug. send it off to the developers again. (fml?)
anyway, they get it back to you, let’s say in another week. you get the package, and you pop in the disk again. you’re ready to go with drake and the gang to finish this bitch off! soon, you’re running down the alleyway while the truck chases you, and you’re screaming [not in real life] and shooting that mofo because it’s your job. you go to jump and – IT FREEZES.
rinse and repeat this cycle for 6 months. when you’ve found every glitch in the game, and it’s finally released to the public, do you care it won a whole bunch of awards? hell no. it was like that groundhog day movie, only in real life! your life! plus, in between testing uncharted 2, you had a whole lot of other games to go through, all with problems. legend has it that bethesda’s testers went insane after fallout 3, and we are left with their legacy.
moral of the story? avoid the tester. avoid it totally.