video games have taught me a lot about life. here are some tips i wish to share with you:
- if you wreck your ride, you can’t jack another car.
- don’t ever shoot something just for fun.
- you can’t actually ever hide from cops.
- if you’re in a shoot-out with friends and you get shot, go to a hospital. do not hide behind a rock and hope your health regenerates.
- if someone double-crosses you, report it to the police. your friends love you, but won’t want to repeatedly support whatever crusade you try to drag them into.
- not all eastern europeans are up to something untowards.
- if a nuclear bomb falls in the country, think very carefully about eating and drinking contaminated food. radiation poisoning actually results in death.
- if you drive a car into the water, it won’t disappear.
- running into pedestrians isn’t nearly as fun in real life. insurance companies tend to be very suspicious of blood on/in a car.